Alexander The Great Overstatement [Rohan]


       So this man, Alexander The Great, was he really great, or was he just a huge overstatement. Well, I believe he was not only a great overstatement, but a gigantic overstatement. I don’t know why we call a man who has killed hundreds of thousands of innocent people just so he could conquer some more land. I mean come on, when he first sat on the throne, he already had plenty of land, but no. He needed to conquer more land. Why though, was there any reason at all for him to conquer more land. Nope absolutely not, except for the reason that he wanted to be the best. To be truly honest, that is selfish on top of stupid.
Image result for alexander's empire
Now that may see like a lot of land but what was the only reason he conquered all of that land? Yes, correct! Just so he could be the very best of them all. Now let us look through some of the traits of our so called, “Alexander The Great”.

  • Murderous

  • Pompous

  • Foolish

Okay so murderous, yeah, I guess you could call him murderous after he killed 100,000 people just so he could conquer some more of that thing that he already has plenty of1. What is it called again? Oh yeah, that’s right, land. If you ask me that is definitely not a justifiable means to an end.

Now onto our next trait, pompous. As I explained before, he did not need to conquer all of that land and kill all those people. Nope, he could have just stayed put and enjoyed his life as a ruler, but of course, he wants to be the very best.

Now onto our last trait for Mr. Alexander, foolish. Yeah, I mean he cut off a man’s head just because of some silly prophet2. If you don’t call that foolish, then I don’t know what you can call foolish. Oh wait no, silly me. There is one more thing. The guy thought of himself as a god3! Talk about a foolish person.

I absolutely do not know how even through all of these incidents and traits, Alexander manages to earn the name, “Alexander The Great”. Instead he should be named Alexander The Great Overstatement. He is surely an overstatement. Correction, great overstatement.

1Map Created From Various Sources
2The Legend Of The Hat Band, Ian Worthington, Alexander The Great: Man and God, 2004

3Mini-Q, “How Great Was Alexander The Great”